Saturday, February 27, 2010

Reality check

We got some photos taken for medical records back today. I look horrific, even in shots taken as recently as yesterday. It made me sad. Not because I look disfigured; no doubt I do, but because it was a brutal and stark reminder of how horrific this accident was and still is.

That's why all of your support means so much to me. Thank you. It would be very easy to give in to depression.

--K--

PS: I don't intend to keep looking at the photos but it's actually been an unexpectedly positive experience. It's a little too easy for me to deny the seriousness of what happened. The reality check, and pausing to feel sad (but not immersing myself in it), are good, and healing.

Heaven in a cup

Jello has Chocolate Mousse in the refrigerated foods section. I can't eat it without diluting it with some Muscle Milk because it won't go into the syringe (and I can't locate the "to eat with a syringe" instructions on the package). Heaven in a cup!!

I am pretty tired this morning; had a lot of trouble sleeping last night. But yesterday was a good day and I'll take any good days I can get. I could breathe better; I got to stop taking one of my antibiotics (not that taking it bothered me; I just like taking one fewer thing); and I could wash my hair. Little things make a huge difference!

Our bathroom looks like a pharmacy. I have SO many pills upon pills that I take at various times throughout the day. My latest plan is to sell any of the narcotics to new friends I meet on the street, then advertise for a research study on narcotics and get funding to study that. Clearly this is an overlooked money making scheme if ever there was one!!

A number of people mentioned the staring issue, so I thought I'd follow-up.
I don't think people mean to be rude. I am usually on the other side of the fence anyway. Our society is so bombarded with invasions of our personal space, that I think part of the staring and hesitation is that people don't want to invade it further. People, even strangers, have generally been so nice. I think folks just don't know how to approach disability. I may try to make it easier by leading in with something humorous, like "if it weren't for that fall, I would have won the Gold!" I also don't interpret their responses as pity; I see genuine concern.

I think we can go home Wednesday or Thursday. HOOOOOORRRRAAAAYYYYYY! I miss the Monsters and the doggie and our friends and....

--K--