Friday, February 26, 2010

Better day

Maybe I just needed to have a bad day. Little has changed between yesterday and today, but I'm in much better spirits today.

There is small gyros restaurant near here and every time we walk past it, I crave one with a vengeance. I'm pretty sure I'm eating enough protein but there's a big difference between chewing it and drinking 6 containers of Muscle Milk. I can't wait to down a big plate of beef covered in vegetables! Even after the wires come out in 6-8 weeks though, I think it'll be awhile before I can sink my teeth into that little number.

I uncharacteristically want to sleep half the day. Jake is pushing me to take walks and go out. Last night, we saw Wicked. It was hard to stay awake, but I'm glad I was forced to go. As for the play itself, the plot is a little hard to follow but there's great singing and dancing.

Random observations:

Many people who work in hospitals are dedicated angels who make the world a better place. But there are a number who just don't like their jobs or patients. For example, my roommate (not the "why didn't I get wheat toast??" one) called for a nurse to help her to the rest room at around 3 AM. She was in a lot of pain and on an IV and could not navigate the trip independently. It took no less than 45 minutes for someone to come and that turned out to be the norm. And it's just not that busy at 3 AM! I was way too weak to be making this same trip without assistance but there was no way I was going to wait around for someone. Hospitals teach you a lot about dependency and what it is like to have, or not have, the very basic of needs met.

I like shopping at grocery stores and Target because I can walk around and steady myself with the cart and no one can tell that's why I have the cart.

People don't know what to do with someone who breaks social conventions. I'm not sure I'm any better with this either. I can tell that when people see me, they don't know whether to ask if I'm ok or look away or ignore the huge bruises and bandages on my face. We don't have a social etiquette that says how to handle these things.

Oh dear. Pain meds are kicking in...which is good but I think I should do something more today than type and sleep. So up we go!

--K--

Blech!!

Sorry for the lack of updates today. I was feeling very frustrated with my difficulty breathing; hungry and wanting to eat real food; tired of being tired; fed up with drooling all day long and carrying around a washcloth because I have no control over it...just generally grumpy and crabby and discouraged. I had a small meltdown with Jake earlier.

I'm now having a very late pudding snack a la syringe, and hoping Ms. Terrible Attitude has a better day tomorrow. If not, I'll share my glorious pity party here.

--K--